Wednesday, 24 December 2014

Letter from my Son on my Birthday

Dear Mom

My, my. How did you get to 47?? It feels so strange for me that just s few short years ago you and I were living in Cole street, you just a few years older than I am now.And yet, that yesterday also feels like a lifetime ago, a brother, another brother, a new husband, a company, a property, another, another and another, our dog, Shadow, another, Dori, another Zac, primary school, high school, university...all this 'stuff' that has moved you from a person my age to a person a little older. A little wiser.

It's in this watershed year where I've really begin to marvel at, and appreciate, the gutsy shit you did to keep us whole and safe. I understand, more and more, the ordeal it was to do this, and for a single mother with barely a penny to her name in 1995 to have built the life we have today, twenty years that is a biography worth writing.

I say all of this because I want you to remember what is is you have already done, already overcome, and know that it is seen and appreciated by one of your principle beneficiaries: me. It's a long road we've walked, you and I, and i count myself lucky to be one of the supporting roles in the Trudy Smith/North/Green production.

I know the recent steps have been tough. I know the world has felt as if it were piled high on your shoulders. I am sorry for your hardship, I truly am. But my glimmer of lights this year, seen in your ordeal, came in September. Mom, you asked for help. You really asked, and that both humbled me and made me feel so proud.

Strong is the leader that can honestly wear her fallibility.

Your very human admission that even the great Trudy 'Supermom' Green doesn't have everything together all the time allowed me both the space to step up and contribute and the ability to acknowledge honestly, my own very human flaws. Successful imperfection. Progressive problems. Suddenly these aren't complete paradoxes any more.

I want to tell you I'm here. I want to tell you  I'm paying attention. I know I have yet so much to learn, but I want to keep standing next to you, as you have for me for so many years.

Know that you are not alone. Know that I love you so very dearly and will continue to do so no matter how much we irritate each other! :)

Happy Birthday!

So much Love

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